After a few weeks of being in a fairly upbeatish mood, i'm now back in the pit of despair, and yet again, it's thanks to money.
One of my previous shitly written posts has covered a bit about why I am in a not good money place, but it has got worse...
I currently have over a thousand pounds worth of paydayloans through various companies, which I am juggling, and they just get worse and worse each month.
The thing thats really getting me down though, is that I can actually afford a real loan, no problems, which, even a fairly small loan of £4000 could pay off all of my debts, not including my outstanding student loan. I know that this isn't much compared to a lot of peoples debts, but it is enough to seriously screw my head up.
A few people have suggested either guarantor loans, or moving somewhere cheaper...
Guarantor loans: I don't have anybody who will be a guarantor. I'm completely and utterly financially seperated from my family, since the problems I had at university
Moving somewhere cheaper: I can not mentally live with other people, as I need my own space, and living with other people just makes my head absolutely destroy itself, and, for moving elsewhere, i'd need a deposit...Which I do not have!
I'm feeling in such a shit place mentally, I just want all my money problems to sort themselves out, I want to be able to oay my gas and electric for the first time since July, I want to be able to actually have a life, and not have to get further and further into debt to do so. I want everything to just sort itself out so I can get on with my life, and not have to be constantly worried and getting depressed. It's getting close to the point where my head is going fuck this shit, I can't go on. I hope it doesn't get there, but thats exactly where it feels it's going, and, until my money problems are sorted out, thats the direction it's going to keep going.
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